I’m not even doing the whole ‘if you don’t look for it, it will come’ thing. I’m actually happily single.
I don’t even mind those smug couples hanging about as the ‘summer’ comes to an end. Even when a guy I was texting suddenly stopped replying to my messages I was like, oh well.
Whilst out with my friend the other night and she was telling me how she misses the single life; doing what you want, when you want, how you want etc etc. And how she was happy for me being happily single – then started talking about how much she loves her boyfriend. And for the first time I was like “Aww, this is too cute” (NB: I may get bored of this and ask for the sick bucket)
Why am I suddenly happy with my single status you ask?
A couple of weeks ago I wrote about how much I would like [not want] to have someone to share things with and have an automatic plus one. I still wouldn’t mind that but I am an independent woman (cue: Destiny’s Child) and don’t need someone by my side.
Well, I read an article by Lily about letting go of the past and getting rid of your demons. Basically, moving on. So I wrote a letter. I wrote a letter to myself, and to some of the guys (mainly one) who had messed me about throughout my dating experience. Obviously, I didn’t send them. That would be very silly of me indeed, and also slightly sad.
I didn’t want to set them on fire in our shared garden in case the neighbours thought I was up to some sort of wizardry. So, I read them out aloud and really felt the words I was saying. I was slightly worried about the whole ‘setting them on fire thing’ in case the whole place went up in smoke. Even if it might have meant sexy firemen coming to rescue me (I know, I know). I also didn’t want to set them on fire in our shared garden in case the neighbours thought I was up to some sort of wizardry. That would be awkward whenever we passed in the hallway. So I tore them into tiny pieces, threw them in my bin, and made sure to instantly throw them in the trash outside.
I know where I went wrong and how I allowed things to happen. But I also realise that it’s isn’t just my fault when things go tit’s up. And I shouldn’t be so hard on myself when people mess me around.
I should be, and am, happily single… For now anyway … Happily Single… For Real!!
Until next time,
Bella x
- Happily Single … For Real? - May 22, 2019