Starting a new relationship is best to do when your heart and mind are available.  When you are not ready for a new love experience, it will reflect in your actions and attitude.  Here are signs that you are over your ex and ready to date someone new:

You Feel Happier

The first few days after the breakup probably felt very difficult as you struggled to come to terms with the fact that your relationship is over.  Every time you focused on the turmoil you’ve been through with your ex, your head ached.  But soon, you started feeling differently as you realized that you are much happier without the tensions that were part of your previous experience.

The veil has been lifted from your eyes and you are seeing your ex for the first time.  You wonder how you put up with things that bothered you, and you vow not to tolerate certain irritations again.  You are also seeing yourself and you realize where you could have handled things differently during the relationship too.  Instead of feeling desperate to have a “second chance” with your former flame, what you now crave is a fresh new start with someone new who doesn’t remind you of your ex at all. You are ready to date.

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You’ve Created Distance & Healthy Boundaries

The first few days after your romantic partnership ended were fraught with temptations; urges to stalk your ex’s social media accounts to see if he/she kept any evidence that the two of you used to be an item.  You most likely wanted to see proof that your former partner was suffering over the breakup because their signs of sadness would help you feel more vindicated that you are the winner of the battle between you.

When you avoid contacting your ex either directly or indirectly through mutual friends, you are taking steps to move forward with your life.  Staying away from your previous mate’s friends, family, neighborhood, workplace, and social media accounts is the best thing you can do to help yourself transition to living a new life.  Keeping your distance from your exes and insisting that it shows the same respect to you will set the tone for your future which will hopefully be free from drama.signs you are over your ex and ready to date

Excitement about Setting New Goals

There are so many wonderful things to look forward to when the future looks bright and you’re ready to date.  The period between the end of your previous union and the start of a new connection should be a time when you set audacious goals. These dating and relationship goals can be things you had always wanted to happen in previous pairings, but they never happened.

If you had always wanted to travel to India with your partner but none of the people who you were involved with had an interest in going there with you, then create a goal that the next person you date will want to travel to places where you want to go.  If you daydream about dating someone who will join you in attending sports events or musical shows (experiences you enjoy doing that your ex never wanted to share with you), then focus on finding a new partner who will help you make that dream come true.

You know that you’re ready to move on because your focus is no longer on your past mistakes; instead, your focus is on finding a suitable companion and feeling confident that you won’t have to settle for less than what you feel you deserve.

 

Akua Hinds
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