We all know what it’s like to stress about what to wear on a first date, after all, first impressions are so important. Every time you’re off to meet a new guy you ask yourself the same questions; Hair – up or down? Jeans or a dress? Bright or natural lipstick? What is the best accessory to land more dates?
As you toss different failed outfits on the floor and stress about what type of vibe you are going to give off, you work yourself into a tizzy. Next thing you know your confidence is down, you’re settling for the same outfit you wore on your last first date and you head out the door feeling defeated. Not exactly the best way to start off your potential new relationship.
The Best Accessory to Land More Dates
Wouldn’t it be great to know that there is an accessory that is free and bound to land more dates? Of course it would! Even if you don’t like the guy, you want to feel like you put forth your best self, right? Well, I am going to solve this problem! Brace yourself, this answer may seem cheesy, but I am here to tell you, the best accessory to land more dates is, drum roll please – your smile!
I know, I know, you’re rolling your eyes and ready to skip to the essay about having multiple orgasms, but if you have a moment stay with me – I’m onto something here (personal experience has proven me right!)
When we meet someone for the first time we are both entering unknown territory. No matter how many dates you’ve been on, you can’t predict the conversation or the mood that your newest situation will induce, and if you think you can, my guess is that you are assuming the worst. When you walk into a date with bets that it will be, “bad just like all the others,” you actually set the tone for that to occur.
Take a step back. Wipe the slate clean. The only thing you have control over is how you present yourself…
Take a step back. Wipe the slate clean. The only thing you have control over is how you present yourself and you must be going on this date in hopes that it will be good. Somewhere in your soul you want it to work out to be something amazing! (If you don’t you should re-evaluate what you’re doing!) So, what better way to start the date than to walk in, not only confident, but warm.
Think back to when you were in school and had your first day with a new teacher. It was the teachers who had a big smile that created a comforting environment. You immediately felt at ease because this person seemed kind and safe. First day jitters were lifted and you felt a sense of relief knowing that this class would be supportive and upbeat. Now think about the opposite, the first days of a class where the teacher had a permanent frown and a cold demeanor. You dreaded that class because the teacher was so miserable. You couldn’t wait to get back to the other class where everyone had a positive energy and you were inspired to participate and be involved with all the other happy students.
What the Right Accessory Does for You
Dating is just like this. If you walk into a date with a bright smile, you are putting forth a positive energy. Your bright aura will actually color the atmosphere of the entire evening and you are far more likely to stay for a second and third drink than if you walked in looking like a deer in headlights. You know when they say, ‘fake it ’till you make it’? Slapping on a smile is going to help you do this! I understand that not every person is innately outgoing or confident, but putting on a smile is easy enough, right? Chances are your grin is going to put your date not only at ease, but make him smile too, therefore giving back to you that same gentle feeling. Creating a bright ambiance to embark upon your date will lift feelings of awkwardness or discomfort and give you both the opportunity to figure out if you have a connection.
It’s true that we have to kiss a lot of frogs to find our prince and it is easy to get bogged down by the dating process. The only thing you can control is how you present yourself and I feel confident that you will feel more successful in your dating life when you wear a smile. You can practice this in your daily life before your next date.
Try walking into the grocery store with your head held high and a slight grin. You’ll be amazed how people in your presence will respond to you. I’m sure you will get smiles back and probably some hellos. Heck, maybe you’ll even get asked out! If you think this sounds too overwhelming, that’s ok. I understand you might feel like a freak if you walk down the block looking like the Cheshire cat from Alice in Wonderland.
So, take a step back and observe. Look at the people in the coffee shop, watch your waiter at dinner; what demeanor are all these folks giving off? Are they smiling? How does their presence make you feel? Really take a few moments to assess what you are seeing. If someone smiles at you do you smile back? Taking these situations into account will come to show that you have a better feeling around those who had a playful smirk than those who looked like the Joker from Batman.
Once you have evaluated people around you and the feeling that you got, you should have a better grounds to give my idea a shot! As we know your smile is free and will distract your date from your lack luster t-shirt and jeans. While you present your best self, it is likely your date will do the same (and if he doesn’t you can be the one choosing to opt out of date number two!)
You’ll probably be overwhelmed when you notice your calendar has filled up because every first date has turned into a second and a third. The best thing to take away from your dating journey is a confidence and self worth that you feel about yourself. It’s easy to feel judged and to get down, but all you can control is your own mind. So find your self value, own it and emit it! If someone doesn’t want to be with your best self, then there is no reason you should want to be with him!
- The Best Accessory to Land More Dates - June 11, 2020